I feel like I’ve hit a wall.
I’ve been trying to blog, but haven’t seem to be able to figure out anything to write about. Rather, I haven’t been able to write about anything. I typed up a whole post, read over it and started editing, before letting myself hate it. So I deleted it. And started again. Same thing, though this time I didn’t let myself get as far.
And then I realized it’s not just my writing. It’s my whole life. I seem to be approaching a crossroads in my life, and I’ve been trying to find some clarity, but nothing is happening. I’ve been working at my job for about five months now, but for some reason I’m dissatisfied. Which is strange, because I can add up the things I like about it. It’s close to home, the people are nice, the office building is nice, I enjoy the work I do, there are good perks…pretty much everything about it is a positive. So it’s hard to understand why I don’t like it.
On the other hand, I know it’s probably not going to be where I end up. It’s my first job. So the beauty is, I can look for other jobs. But that’s where the problem is. I don’t even know where to start looking. People ask, what type of job are you looking for? I don’t know. What industry? I don’t know. Meanwhile, the longer I stay at my job, the more dissatisfied I feel.
I don’t need to rush or make any rash decisions, but I can start now. I’ve been trying to just skim jobs, brainstorm ideas. Trying to think about things I enjoy, industries I’d be interested in. Trying to figure out what I want to do with my life. Nothing’s happened yet, but hopefully soon I’m able to get through this crossroad and gain some clarity on where I’m meant to go next.